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While these internal revolutions were going on, her external life had been as busy and uneventful as usual, and if she sometimes looked serious or a little sad no one observed it but Professor BhaerHe did it so quietly that Jo never knew he was watching to see if she would accept and profit by his reproof, but she stood the test, and he was satisfied, for though no words passed between them, he knew that she had given up writingNot only did he guess it by the fact that the second finger of her right hand was no longer inky, but she spent her evenings downstairs now, was met no more among newspaper offices, and studied with a dogged patience, which assured him that she was bent on occupying her mind with something useful, if not pleasant
He helped her in many ways, proving himself a true friend, and Jo was happy, for while her pen lay idle, she was learning other lessons besides German, and laying a foundation for the sensation story of her own life
It was a pleasant winter and a long one, for she did not leave MrsEveryone seemed sorry when the time cameThe children were inconsolable, and MrBhaer's hair stuck straight up all over his head, for he always rumpled it wildly when disturbed in mind
"Going home? Ah, you are happy that you haf a home to go in," he said, when she told him, and sat silently pulling his beard in the corner, while she held a little levee on that last evening
She was going early, so she bade them all discount hermes goodbye overnight, and when his turn came, she said warmly, "Now, Sir, you won't forget to come and see us, if you ever travel our way, will you? I'll never forgive you if you do, for I want them all to know my friend
"Do you? Shall I come?" he asked, looking down at her with an eager expression which she did not see
"Yes, come next monthLaurie graduates then, and you'd enjoy commencement as something new
"That is your best friend, of whom you speak?" he said in an altered toneI'm very proud of him and should like you to see him
Jo looked up then, quite unconscious of anything but her own pleasure in the prospect of showing them to one anotherBhaer's face suddenly recalled the fact that she might find Laurie more than a `best friend', and simply because she particularly wished not to look as if anything was the matter, she involuntarily began to blush, and the more she tried not to, the redder she grewIf it had not been for Tina on her kneeShe didn't know what would have become of herFortunately the child was moved to hug her, so she managed to hide her face an instant, hoping the Professor did not see itBut he did, and his own changed again from that momentary anxiety to its usual expression, as he said cordially
"I fear I shall not make the time for that, but I wish the friend much success, and you all happinessGott bless you!" And with that, he shook hands warmly, shouldered Tina, and went away
But after the boys were abed, gucci backpack he sat long before his fire with the tired look on his face and the `heimweh', or homesickness, lying heavy at his heartOnce, when he remembered Jo as she sat with the little child in her lap and that new softness in her face, he leaned his head on his hands a minute, and then roamed about the room, as if in search of something that he could not find
"It is not for me, I must not hope it now," he said to himself, with a sigh that was almost a groanThen, as if reproach- ing himself for the longing that he could not repress, he went and kissed the two tousled heads upon the pillow, took down his seldom-used meerschaum, and opened his Plato
He did his best and did it manfully, but I don't think he found that a pair of rampant boys, a pipe, or even the divine Plato, were very satisfactory substitutes for wife and child at home
Early as it was, he was at the station next morning to see Jo off, and thanks to him, she began her solitary journey with the pleasant memory of a familiar face smiling its farewell, a bunch of violets to keep her company, and best of all, the happy thought, "Well, the winter's gone, and I've written no books, earned no fortune, but I've made a friend worth having and I'll try to keep him all my life
CHAPTER THIRTY-FIVE
Whatever his motive might have been, Laurie studied to some purpose that year, for he graduated with honor, and gave the Latin oration with the grace of a Phillips and the eloquence of a montre cartier Demosthenes, so his friends saidThey were all there, his grandfather--oh, so proud--MrMarch, John and Meg, Jo and Beth, and all exulted over him with the sincere admiration which boys make light of at the time, but fail to win from the world by any after-triumphs
"I've got to stay for this confounded supper, but I shall be home early tomorrowYou'll come and meet me as usual, girls?" Laurie said, as he put the sisters into the carriage after the joys of the day were overHe said `girls', but he meant Jo, for she was the only one who kept up the old customShe had not the heart to refuse her splendid, successful boy anything, and answered warmly
"I'll come, Teddy, rain or shine, and march before you, playing `Hail the conquering hero comes' on a jew's-harp
Laurie thanked her with a look that made her think in a sudden panic, "Oh, deary me! I know he'll say something, and then what shall I do?" Evening meditation and morning work somewhat allayed her fears, and having decided that she wouldn't be vain enough to think people were going to propose when she had given them every reason to know what her answer would be, she set forth at the appointed time, hoping Teddy wouldn't do anything to make her hurt his poor feelingsA call at Meg's, and a refreshing sniff and sip at the Daisy and Demijohn, still further fortified her for the tete-a-tete, but when she saw a stalwart figure looming in the distance, she had a strong desire to turn about black chanel tote and run away
"Where's the jew's-harp, Jo?" cried Laurie, as soon as he was within speaking distance And Jo took heart again, for that salutation could not be called loverlike
She always used to take his arm on these occasions, now she did not, and he made no complaint, which was a bad sign, but talked on rapidly about all sorts of faraway subjects, till they turned from the road into the little path that led homeward through the groveThen he walked more slowly, suddenly lost his fine flow of language, and now and then a dreadful pause occurredTo rescue the conversation from one of the wells of silence into which it kept falling, Jo said hastily, "Now you must have a good long holiday!"
"I intend to
Something in his resolute tone made Jo look up quickly to find him looking down at her with an expression that assured her the dreaded moment had come, and made her put out her hand with an imploring, "No, TeddyPlease don't!"
"I will, and you must hear meIt's no use, Jo, we've got to have it out, and the sooner the better for both of us," he answered, getting flushed and excited all at once
"Say what you like thenI'll listen," said Jo, with a desperate sort of patience
Laurie was a young lover, but he was in earnest, and meant to `have it out', if he died in the attempt, so he plunged into the subject with characteristic impetuousity, saying in a voice that would get choky now and then, in spite of manful efforts to keep it balenciaga motorcycle handbag stea |